How To Tell If Your Toddler Is Not Adjusting To A New School

Introducing your child to a new school can be an exciting part of parenthood. But for your little one, it can sometimes be difficult. In some cases, this adjustment takes a toll on their emotional well-being.

From nursery registration to meeting their teachers to trying to make friends, preschool can be quite stressful for a little one. Although some children can adjust quickly to the new environment, others may require a bit more help and encouragement.

To help you out, this article tackles important facts about how children adjust to a new school, including the tell-tale signs that they are having a hard time doing so.

3 Stages of Child Development

From birth and beyond, children go through different stages before they are ready for any formal education setup. Because of this, many nurseries offer early learning classes for tots as young as six months old to help them gradually adjust to the big world that awaits them.

To further understand this, here are the three stages of development that children go through  when it comes to making the home-to-school transition:

Stage #1: 0 to 2 years old

Babies aged six months and up may already become more aware of new people in their lives. As their awareness raises, we must ensure the introduction is gradual.

This is also the point when your little one may get anxious when separating from you. More commonly called “separation anxiety,” these feelings – anger, fear, and sadness – caused by the separation often emerge because a child feels very loved by specific people in his life: his parents.

This is mainly because he still does not know that separation is often only temporary, causing strong feelings of anxiety to bubble up inside him. Your toddler is only beginning to grasp the idea of object permanence. He has yet to fully understand that people and things can still exist despite the fact he doesn’t see them.

To help babies adjust, playing peek-a-boo might help. This game reinforces the understanding that people and things don’t necessarily disappear when they are out of sight.

While they may ease into a new place or environment better than babies, two-year-olds still need predictability to help them gradually feel comfortable in a new setting.

Stage #2: 3 to 4 years old

When they reach three years old, toddlers may have already established strong connections with their parents and teachers. This strong bond will help them get over the separation as they keep their parents in mind even though they are not physically present. When this happens, children would use their coping mechanism which would help them feel better.

However, the situation may differ from one child to another. We cannot predict a child’s reaction which will highly depend on his needs, interests, experiences, and temperament.

Some three-year-olds may show signs of independence, while others may exhibit regressive behavior, like being clingy or baby talk. If your child exhibits the latter, don’t be scared; it’s probably his way of telling you to stay a bit longer when you drop him off at school.

Stage #3: 5 to 6 years old

At the age of five, children are ready to initiate conversations even with people they are unfamiliar with. This is because, at this stage, most children feel empowered and motivated to share their interests and play with others.

When this happens, don’t hesitate to encourage this behaviour to help your child overcome any fears he may have about new environments. Luckily, most kindergartners already consider the school environment to be a safe place for them to start new relationships with new people.

Common Signs That Your Child Is Not Adjusting to a New School

Different toddlers react in different ways when it comes to starting school. While some may find it easy to adjust to the new environment, others may need a bit more help.

Some children may not be able to communicate their feelings when adjusting at school. When this happens, there are usually some signs that tell children need more time and assistance.

Stomach aches before or after school

Many children complain about tummy aches, nausea, and diarrhea before or after school. Often, this is a signal that something is going on, and he cannot tell you.

This is common for kids who are conscientious, always follow the rules, and don’t “act out” when they are upset. In this case, your child may be internalizing his distress, which causes him to feel “butterflies” fluttering in his stomach.

Other signs you should look for include:

●       Frequent trips to the bathroom before school

●       Losing interest in after-school activities

●       Changes in eating patterns

Increase of cravings for sweetened and flour-based foods

Speaking of eating patterns, another major red flag you should look out for when introducing your child to a new school is cravings. To be more specific, an increase in his consumption of sugar- and flour-based foods.

Significant changes in a person’s diet and food preferences are usually a sign that something is going on. For children, it might mean that their bodies are trying to adjust to the increasing levels of stress chemicals.

A study explained that this also happens to adults when they “stress eat” and reach for their comfort foods. Most of the time, they turn to candies, chocolates, cakes, and other flour- and white sugar-based products when under stress.

For children, the usual stress-eating foods include:

●       Mac and cheese

●       Pizza

●       Bread

●       Crackers

●       Cookies

●       Candy bars

However, experts recommend that children are offered fruits, vegetables, and protein-rich foods instead, especially when they’re anxious. This is because consuming too much of anything can cause an imbalance in the gut. Tolerating this behavior may also lead to a maladaptive stress cycle when the child grows up.

The Takeaway

Adjusting to a new school – whether it’s your child’s first time at school or not – can be a stressful time for your little one. Before trying different things to help your child adapt to the new environment, we would advise you first understand what stage your child is at and what is expected at his age. Keeping a lookout for signs that he is indeed having issues is also an excellent idea.

AUTHOR BIO

Alan Williamson is the Chief Education Officer at Kings' Education, a premium school brand in Dubai which leads a fantastic group of premium UK curriculum schools, including Child’s Play Nursery. As well as being passionate about teaching and learning, Alan has been actively involved in school leadership related to Special Educational Needs.