3 Things To Tell Your Child Before A Funeral Service


Depending on the age of your child(ren), you will want to emotionally help prepare them for everything they might experience at a funeral service. Funerals can be strange to a young child who has never attended a funeral before. They may see adults openly weeping, people looking distressed, open casket funerals, etc. These sights might be overwhelming for a young child which is why explaining this to your children may help improve the entire experience. Everything in this post will directly relate to children old enough to speak and understand words.

1.       Adults May Be Crying

Children may have never seen an adult cry in their entire life, let alone a room full of people crying at a funeral. This can easily over stimulate your child. Before the funeral service it is important to let your child know that the purpose of memorial services is to pay remembrance to the person who has passed away and to show support of other family members and loved ones. By explaining that adults and kids express grief through crying, your child will understand that this is a natural and healthy way to express grief. This is a great way to help your child emotionally grow. After all, children learn best through the examples that their parents and other adults set.  

2.       Family Members May Ask Your Child How They Are Feeling

During the funeral service it is natural to have family members and friends ask your kid how they are doing. Children often have a very difficult time expressing themselves through words, especially at a young age. By explaining to your child before the funeral that people may come up and ask about you and offer you hugs, you are once again preparing your child for what they can expect at the funeral service. You need to emphasize that your child should not feel guilty or embarrassed by expressing their feelings.  In this way, you are ensuring a better experience for your child that will hopefully encourage emotional growth. 

3.       Let Your Child Get Involved

Ask your child if they want to write or draw something to leave in the casket. If you are planning the funeral yourself, involve the child in cremation urn selection, wreath decoration, or flower selection. By getting your child involved in the funeral planning process, you are giving your child another healthy outlet to express themselves in. You can learn how to save money on funeral services here.

 Depending on the age of the child they may want to say something at the funeral as well. The inclusion of your children in the funeral process will make them feel a deeper appreciation for the importance of funerals in the grieving process. It will also allow them to be more comfortable in any future funeral services they may have to attend. Make sure that you are not forcing your child to participate and speak. If your child does not want to participate or speak then that is their choice. Remember that everyone, including your own children, grieve differently. Give your children room to grieve while gently guiding them with reassuring words and actions. 

Are You Planning a Funeral?

If you are planning a funeral, find a beautiful cremation urn at Safe Passage Urns to memorialize a loved one. Our blog is also a wonderful resource for all things funeral related. If you find yourself planning the funeral service of a loved one, please do not hesitate to contact us for advice and options!