Dignity In Divorce - A Guide To Keeping The Family Healthy

There’s nothing more important than family. It is the thing that can keep us rooted to this world, and the unconditional love we might share with some, such as our children, can help us become better day after day. Unfortunately, everything that is great always has a chance of failing, or succumbing to sad events over time. When this happens to a family, it can be twice as tragic.

This means that if you and your partner are opting for a divorce, settling things in the most dignified manner possible becomes somewhat of a necessity, no matter how hard that can be. This can seem like an outrage to suggest. After all, emotions run high at this time, and it’s not as if you can simply hide the entire thing from your children, who will notice the changing living arrangements and the shifting presence between both family members. It is essential for the stability, mental health and ease of everyone involved in this difficult time that you do your best to stay as dignified as you can. We have some advice to this end:

Be Clear With Your Children, But Spare The Details

It is important to clear the conflict away from your children. Do not argue, fight, or allow them to see you at your worst. Seeing you upset is another thing, and bound to happen during this experience. Furthermore, children are observant. They know when they are being lied to about certain topics, and they hear more than you think. This means that often, it can be worth being clear with them about your separation, and the new normal of life that is bound to take place. 

Do so in a clear manner, careful, and with nothing but supportive emotion. On top of this, spare them the details. There’s no reason to talk to them of infidelity or a range of other issues that might have caused said break-up. Just suggest that you will both still be friends but will not be married anymore, and your children will still see both parents regularly. This can soften the blow for a child, even if slightly.

Do Not ‘Score Points’

There is never any need to score points one way or another. You have both lost due to the experience you are going for now. An insult to make you feel better will only make you feel worse in the long run, or accepting said insults thrown at you will only erode your self esteem. Be professional, friendly as time passes, or just impartial if necessary. Respect yourself and keep your head up. When you avoid the game they might want to play, you can focus on what really matters.

Use Divorce Mediators

Divorce mediators are the best means at ensuring you set up worthwhile lines of contact, that you can talk through your issues correctly and that you both avoid showing the worst parts of your character. Going through an impartial service such as this can make a real difference in the long run. You’re sure to find out why. If you are looking for professional mental health support to navigate life post divorce, platforms like ReGain and BetterHelp have online therapy options you can explore."

With this advice, we hope you can find the truest dignity in your divorce. We wish you the best of luck during this difficult time.